Have you ever been so excited to be off from work for a long weekend or more and then, seemingly out of nowhere, you come down feeling sicker than you have in months?
For years, this was me.
I’d be feeling great at work, then the first morning off, bam, I’d feel like I got hit by a bus, had strep throat or an upper resp infection.
Obviously, I thought it was kind of amazing. Don’t get me wrong, I didn’t LIKE being sick on vacation but I was soo grateful that getting sick didn’t influence work. I actually thought my body was taking care of me, supporting my strong desire to get ahead at work and be all I could be. I thought this was a gift of mine, an ability.
It wasn’t until many years later, both of this happening and diving deeper into the personal growth journey, that I realized what was actually happening.
At work, I was operating on such a high level of adrenaline, my body was acting as if it was in survival mode for a majority of the hours. In this mode, much like a parent who’s been severely injured, but is focused on saving their child, my body wasn’t letting me feel sick, it was blocking it out. It wasn’t that my body was saving me; I was so disconnected from my body I couldn’t access what was really going on. When I left work and its/my expectations, the adrenaline stopped and I would go into “shock,” break down, become overwhelmed with all the stress my body had been feeling, and get sick.
Now, I know it can be different. I know that removing myself from the stressor (boss, boyfriend, teacher, work, etc.) isn’t actually enough; I know I need to process the actual stress created by that stressor. Now, I know I can get ahead and be all I want to be in my work AND not get taken out by sickness, either at work or on vacation.
What can you do to break your own cycle?
1. List healthy ways you physically process stress. Don’t include activities that let you escape your feelings: alcohol, drugs, binge eating/watching, doom scrolling, etc. Think of activities like journaling, running, dancing, singing, swinging a baseball bat, crying, being in nature. You know how dogs do that cute thing where they shake themselves silly? That’s what you’re going for: a way to release the stress from your mind and body.
2. Feel stressed out by something during the day? Start a list. Write down the cue(person/situation) and how it makes you feel(anxious/mad/sad).
3. When you have time, start with one cue. Think about it, how it made you feel. Then, take on one of those activities that helps you process stress. Journal for 5 minutes. Sprint down the block. Yell into a pillow. You want to get to a place where you feel as though you’ve let go of the stress. It doesn’t mean you’re okay with what happened. It just means that pent up energy, adrenaline isn’t there anymore, you’ve released it.
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